How many men?

[Kirk Reiser]

1. How many honest, intelligent, caring men in the world does it take
to do the dishes?
Both of them.

2.  How does a man show that he is planning for the future?
He buys two cases of beer.

3. What is the difference between men and government bonds?
The bonds mature.

4. Why are blonde jokes so short?
So men can remember them.

5. How many men does it take to change a roll of toilet paper?
Who knows? It has never happened.

6. Why is it difficult to find men who are sensitive, caring and good
looking?
They already have boyfriends.

7. What do you call a woman who knows where her husband is every night?
A widow.

8. When do you care for a man's company?
When he owns it.

9. Why are married women heavier than single women?
Single women come home, see what's in the fridge and go to bed.
Married women come home, see what's in bed and go to the fridge.

10. How do you get a man to do sit-ups?
Put the remote control between his toes.

11. What is the one thing that all men at singles bars have in common?
They're married.

12. Man says to God: "God, why did you make woman so beautiful?"
God says: "So you would love her."
"But God," the man says, "why did you make her so dumb?"
God says:"So she would love you."